Bringing It All Together 27: Hope for the Dead

What happens when someone is completely resistant to change? Even though they are asking for help, they really only want symptom relief, or for you to side with their anger towards another, or for you to affirm their dysfunction, or deny there is anything worth pondering? What do you do when the forecast of change seems hopeless?

Let's say that Beverly is struggling with anxiety. Her doctor sent her to you, as a prerequisite for prescribing her anxiety meds. But now that she is on the meds and is feeling a little better, she doesn't see the point of counseling. As you ask questions about her family background, she responds defensively and doesn't see what the point of discussing that is. From her intake form you know that she has experienced abuse by her father and ex-husband, but she refuses to go there. Beverly doesn't want healing. She wants relief. Is there hope for Beverly, in this life, to live with a whole heart that is undivided and free to love?

Though Beverly doesn't believe this, YOU have to be very clear on a view of humanity guided by God's creation of her in His image. Though Beverly's heart seems dead, you know it IS down in there. She IS wired to connect with people deeply, and because of that she DOES hunger to have her heart freed, no matter how buried and numb it seems to be.

So when Beverly "feels nothing," you must be filled with hope for her as you remind yourself that God has made her in His image hungry for meaningful relationships. Even the person who is "dead" has the need, and God-given capacity to relate. It has NOT been completely destroyed by the Fall.

Beverly may walk away before you can reach her, but you provide the opportunity for Beverly to experience relationship in a different way. Someone who is full of HOPE can reach out to her, love her well despite her resistance, not believe the outward appearance but explore the beauty and sorrow buried deep within her. The Lord may just be pleased to use YOU to awaken the dead!