Sunday, September 18, 2011

The Counselor is...

Yes, I am keenly aware that I haven't really posted anything in a few weeks. I have dived deep into the waters of my counseling internship. About 5 times, I've started to write posts about my initial experiences. But they never make it to "print."

There's the crazy scheduling part.
I'm learning how to juggle my schedule with clients, to leave a slight bit of margin, so I can get the kids off to school and sit down with someone without being completely frazzled. And I can leave enough time at the end of the day to finish the necessary paperwork, not bring it home with me, and rushing off to pick the girls up without risking life and limb to meet their bus. So far, I'm spending about an hour per client thinking through what we discussed, writing out reflection notes, and processing ideas for our next session together. I thought there would be time to study for class in between clients, but that's not happening. But this is not really what I'm learning.

I have 6 clients so far. One couple; 5 women. They are a mix of different ages, ethnicities, social classes, backgrounds, and needs. Ideally I could take on more (so they tell me), but so far 6 feels PLENTY. I can't tell you about them, but I wish I could, because I'm learning so much through them. I wish you could hear their stories. Because the most poignant moments are in their stories.

But mostly, it's not because of confidentiality that I haven't written. It's just because I don't know how to articulate the impact its having on my soul. Some moments feel so ordinary that they are too banal to write about. But many moments feel sacred and beyond the blogsphere, and I have no words. But maybe the words will start flowing, and then you'll be the first to know.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

“It is important to tell at least from time to time the secret of who we truly and fully are—even if we tell it only to ourselves—because otherwise we run the risk of losing track of who we truly and fully are and little by little come to accept instead the highly edited version which we put forth in hope that the world will find it more acceptable than the real thing.”

Frederick Buechner, Telling Secrets