Woes of the Chinese Post Office

4 weeks ago, my parents mailed 2 packages filled with fun things I had ordered online--children's books, Jim's birthday presents, etc... I kept a sharp lookout for the package slip... I hadn't figured out yet how things worked with the post office, but it seemed that IF you get a slip, then your package has been "flagged". Why? Nan shuo... (Hard to say) They explanation I was offered was that maybe it had something forbidden in it (like something we'd like to make copies of first), or maybe the package had fallen apart in transit. Uhuh.

So the fated day arrived. I got a (one, not two) slip. "Well, at least one made it here", I thought. So I went to the post office to get it, and...

When you bring your 4 and 2 year old to the post office on the day their daddy left town to pick up a package from Nana, you had better deliver. Great expectations and jubilations are counted on. So you can imagine the disappointment when they said--
"No, it's not here. It is at another post office."
"But this slip says that it is at this post office."
"Yes, but it is not here."
"Where is that post office?"
"Oh, it's quite far"
"Could they deliver it?" "Oh, no...well, maybe, no, no...you can ask, but probably not."
We boo hooed for awhile, and then went back home.

My helper happened to be there that day. (Yes, I have a helper. A dear lady who I am so grateful for, as without a car, she helps me run errands without needing to take the girls.) She immediately offered to go get it for me the next day. I gave her a copy of my residence permit, and she left.

She lives 1 1/2 hrs. away by bus. The post office is on the way from her house to mine. So she stopped by the next morning on the way to my house. But, as all sagas must be drawn out and complicated, they would not give her my package. It was a copy of my residence permit I gave her-- not the original.
"But this copy clearly states her name, address, and visa number."
"Yes, but it is not clear." This one can be forged. It must be original."

So that day, my sweet helper came back to my house (1 hr), took my original residence permit, and then set out AGAIN to get the package (3 hr round trip). I was a bit nervous about giving her the original-- It is irreplaceable. But I wanted that package! I was hoping that that one had Jim's gifts in it in time for his bday (Sept. 20th)

When she returned the second time, she asked them,
"Why was this package sent here exactly?"
"You should not send such bao gui de (precious/expensive) things. You should only send pu tong de (normal everyday) things. It is not here. Wait for the package notice at your local post office." (Is this an admission of guilt, I wondered?)
But they DID give her the first package. Glorious!

It arrived full of many wonderful fall and winter children's books. Without English libraries, I try to stock our books as plentifully as we can afford! And yet, we still hoped for the second package...

A week passed, and so with it the hope that we would ever see #2. Jim's birthday presents, (I was so excited to think of something for his birthday other than books, coffee, or guitar paraphanalia this year.), Kathryn's home school materials, a new Miss Patty Cake DVD (Ellie's favorite!), some guitar DVD's from my parent's for Jim's bday...I was certain it was stolen (especially due to the DVD's) , and imagined that anytime I could go downstairs to my local video store and find Miss Patty Cake on display in the children's section. (How else do you think they acquire such a plentiful stock??) But I decided to try our local post office one more time, just to bury the hatchet.

To my very great surprise, although no package notice had been delivered, he handed me another slip. My brief moment of joy over the discovery that our package was in fact NOT lost for good was matched my consternation when he told me that in fact, this package was not here either. Yes, the very same "quite far away" post office. It is hard to be angry in a foreign language, but I think I succeeded.

"But this slip says it is here! I already went to the other post office, and they swore they didn't have it, and they told me it would surely be here!", I pleaded.

To no avail. In China you might occasionally even find a well-informed and compassionate clerk staring back at you from behind the window, (a bit of negative cultural aggression coming out here I admit) but even the nice ones often cannot help you. "Zenme ban" (There is nothing we can do.) So I rushed home...yes my helper was here today too! On the eve of a major Chinese holiday (Oct. 1st is Guo Qing Jie-- a week of celebrations), today is the last day that the post office will be open for the next 10 days! Off she rushed with my original residence permit to fetch the package.

Here I digress. In this drama, I was reminded of a funny story of our earlier years in China, when a teammate-- upon hearing that although his package WAS right there in his plain sight, he could NOT have it because it must be sent elsewhere first to be "checked"--blew his top, recruited an fellow accomplice, and used a "pick and roll" diversion tactic to steal his own package and escape with lightening speed. Yes, now you are beginning to feel why life abroad is the squeezed toothpaste tube of all your own little "personality qwerks", i.e, sin.

You are dying by this point, aren't you, to hear about the fate of package #2?

ME TOO! She still hasn't returned.