Soul Care #23: Approaching Addiction

Addiction, cont...

How do you think about approaching addiction?
1) From the top- Buying time with a bailout. This is helping a person find accountability, helping the person get plugged in with a support group, removing the addictive substance. But if you only bail out, the addiction will return.

2) From the bottom- If you only deal with behavioral intervention, the boat still goes down. They may ditch this addiction for another. Why did they choose this addiction over another? What is the root of dissatisfaction in their life? What is this substance/activity, etc... providing for you?

Just as with anxiety and personality disorders, there is a biological component that makes some more susceptible to addictions. A person is still responsible for their behavior, but that is a factor.

How do you talk with a friend about an addiction?
1) In the office, we help a person be reflective by setting up a vulnerable environment. Turn off the cell phone, make it private, set up no physical blocks between you and that person.

2) PRAY for understanding and curiosity about their heart. If you give off an "I already know what's wrong with you" attitude, very little can take place in your conversation.

3) Body language matters. Face them squarely, lean forward, maintain eye-contact. You learn a lot by looking into their eyes; sometimes even more than what they say. Learn to read a person's eyes.

4) Read the non-verbals of your friend. Their eyes, their skin, their posture... Are they nervous? Restless and fidgety? Excessively agitated? Excessively soft-spoken?

5) Reflective listening- Ask question to understand and not solve their problems. They have already tried the first things you can think of. Don't say "I know how you feel" Don't over plan your response. Invite further discussion.