Trouble At School

I thought that if Kathryn had only Chinese friends (and no English speakers) in her class, then she would be motivated to learn Chinese. I think I was wrong. With a classroom full of only Chinese classmates, she seems to be pushing everyone away.

Last night as we were saying bedtime prayers, I told her that mommy has been praying God would give her a friend in her class, and that maybe it would be good if she also asked God for a friend. She said, "Dear God, please give me an English speaking friend in my class..."

Today when I dropped her off at school, we prayed together and I asked her to look for "one happy moment" in her day that she could tell me about when I picked her up at lunchtime. When I came to get her, she said, "Mommy-- I DID have a VERY happy moment-- It was when my teacher let Jeanie come to my classroom for an HOUR!" (Jeanie is a little foreign friend in another class.)

I don't blame her--I think I was even more reclusive than her when I was a little girl. I can sense the extreme angst she feels when she simply doesn't know what is going on around her!

So you can see my dilemma-- In my mind she doesn't have to go to Chinese school, but it feels like the best opportunity I know to meet little Chinese friends and learn the language...but those have to flow from a heart that wants to embrace the people we live among.

I remember when Jim and I were first married and we were preparing to return to China. I was struggling at that time and I felt my heart felt particularly disconnected from China. As I was lamenting to Jim he reminded me that very few we know "love China" in a generic way... I mean that they just love Chinese things, Chinese language, Chinese culture dramatically more than other places. Rather, in one sense, it's about loving your 'neighbor' in connected relationships, and our neighbors happen to be Chinese. Does that make sense? ...I mean Kathryn will not embrace China until her heart is connected to a Chinese person.

So I ask you to specifically pray that Kathryn would connect meaningfully with one Chinese friend -- not for the sake of doing well in school, but for the sake of connecting her heart to our calling.