Not-so-baby Ellie

I can't believe I'm going to attempt this today, especially when Jim is out of town. But I have no choice. Kathryn isn't the only one who wants to grow up around here-- So does my little baby Ellie! Oh, can't you stay a baby just a little bit longer??

Yes, Ellie is seeking a dramatic exit from her crib. I have seen her half-way out three times, and this last time she got stuck hanging from the top. SO, try as I may to delay the inevitable, she needs a big girl bed. And she's not even 2 yet!

So yesterday the girls and I hiked over to IKEA and bought her the same bed Kathryn has. And last night, after the girls went to bed I assembled it. So it's ready for her to use, but mommy is not ready. Things are going so well at bedtime now. Its so nice only having one to give encouragements, then warnings, then threats about staying in her bed. And in the mornings, we have such a great system. Kathryn wakes up and turns on their light and gives Ellie toys in her crib till mommy comes in, ready to tackle the day. So what time do you think we will all go to sleep tonight?



BYE BYE BABY, HELLO, BIG GIRL!









(Ok, we'll battle the bottle on another week!)

And, by the way, Kathryn is doing really well without her "ba". She and Scruffles have had some setbacks, but I think they are becoming better friends. The important thing is that the passie is history!

Life Without Ba, Day 1

I suppose we should have expected some resistance, but we were blissfully optimistic. After all, she said she was ready. So remind me the next time I count on a three year old to accurately assess her emotional ability to handle a major life change.

The trouble began about 1:30am when Kathryn found the puppy. With a disgruntled look she pulled on our sheets and begged me to come to her room. Phrases such as "I wanted a BLUE puppy" and "I changed my mind", and your general weeping and gnashing of teeth, were characteristic of the next 45 minutes. Sometime in that hour, she gave him the name "Scruffles", which I thought a rather endearing name. Maybe the puppy would make it after all. Eventually I made it back to bed.

Then a half hour later, I heard her door slam. A mommy tip-off from Kathryn "I don't want you to see what's going on in my room, mom." I stumbled back to her room and found the light on. She was rummaging through her stuffed animal basket to see if perhaps the Benkie Fairy had left a BLUE puppy somewhere else. Ellie was especially disheartened to hear that, no, it's not morning time, and mommy isn't here to play. Another 30 minutes pass...

A weeping Kathryn at our bedside. I think the realization must have hit at this point... "My ba is gone, and all I have is this stupid puppy, and what's worse, he's not blue." More discussion, more comforting... "I guess it's a good thing that when you came out of my tummy, I didn't tell the nurse, "I wanted a BLUE Kathryn! Send her back!", I tried. At this point, Kathryn ran from the room, flinging the puppy with force into the bathroom. I think that by about 4am, we all finally fell back asleep, Kathryn on the floor next to our bed. Poor Scruffles was sentenced to his first night alone in the bathtub.

By the light of dawn, (which came painfully soon) Scruffles looked a bit more inviting. Whereas in the middle of the night, he only looked drab brown, we discovered by morning that he actually had more golden tones. And we thought that perhaps, though we can't turn Scruffles blue, maybe we can give him a blue collar. We had a short photo shoot. Kathryn decided it would be better to keep Scruffles than give her to Ellie. (Ellie's efforts to steal him throughout the morning gave him a bit more value in K's eyes.) We made it through the first day. And, what mommy finds curious is that in all the discussion about Scruffles, the dearly departed "ba" was never mentioned. So maybe there is hope.

It's 8pm, night 2. My only hope is that she will be too exhausted to ponder the fate of her "ba" and we will all sleep through the night...

Poor Scruffles. Doesn't he look sweet?

Bye-Bye Ba?

Today is a day of great significance in our short history as parents. After many failed attempts to convince our 3 1/2 year old that it was time to part ways with her beloved passie ("ba"-- when she was 10 months, she gave it this name, and it will forever be called "ba"), she told us unprompted that today she was ready. This is a BIG deal. This ba (not the very one, but this kind!) has been with her since she came home from the hospital, and it has been her most treasured comfort since. So this is a VERY big deal!

I'd like to think that it has been due to all of our transition, and not some kind of deficiency in our parenting, that allows an almost 4 year old child to still sleep with a "ba". Our last separation attempt was mistakenly right before daddy's 2 week trip. What lasted for a couple of days melted in a pile of tears and mommy's weakened resolve. She got the "ba", she was happy, I was happy. I decided then that if she wanted to go to college with the thing strapped around her neck, that wouldn't be so bad.

My sister in law told me about 6 months ago that the "Benkie Fairy" that came to visit their house. Yes, a cousin to the Tooth Fairy visited my niece and left behind (money, I believe?) to pick out a snuggle bear replacement. All of our principles about not "deceiving" our children with notions of Santa and the Easter Bunny were thrown out the window with hopes that this might be the effective motivation. (We're fine with dear old Santa, but they know he's just pretend.) Yet alas, the thought of the Benkie Fairy snatching her "ba" in the middle of the night brought only terror, not bliss. So again we waited. But I did go ahead and buy the requested snuggle puppy to have on hand, just in case the Benkie Fairy should happen to make a special trip to Singapore. And today, as Kathryn brought me her one remaining "ba" in shreds, she said "Mommy, maybe I don't need my ba anymore."

I put in an immediate call to the Benkie Fairy to see, if with just a few hours notice, could she possibly arrive tonight? And having just spoken with her, I have it on very authoritative word that she is feverishly in transit as I write. It's 8pm, and Kathryn is too excited to sleep of course. But just as Santa is probably the one night a year where parents have some agreeable leverage towards obedient behavior, I haven't seen her peek her head out the door once. The Benkie Fairy doesn't come until she goes to sleep, of course.

Do you think we'll make it? Do you think that by tomorrow, January 21st in the year 2007, at 4 months shy of 4 years old, our Kathryn will be passie-free? Say a prayer for us!!

Merry Christmas to you! Hope your day is joyous and full of laughter and delight! Ours has been. The storms parted long enough this afternoon for a Christmas picnic lunch and swim with friends. (This week reported the 3rd highest rainfall in the history of Singapore!)



May we be more enraptured with His love and mercy than all our new toys.
Love to you today,
the Wallaces

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Jesus wanted pumpkin pie for his birthday this year...

It's such fun to make a mess.

Ellie loves mommy's new toy!

Hello, all!
This story below is an adaptation from a story I've heard before, designed to share with our neighbors (who in Singapore have mostly never heard...) the meaning of Christmas. Feel free to bake up some sugar cookies to hand out and use it in your neighborhood too. (OK, it works with or without cookies!) Or just remind yourself again for the first, or thousandth time!

Merry Christmas! We hope you enjoy this Christmas story…

The Christmas Birds: One man’s reflections on the meaning of Christmas

One night during the Christmas season, there was a man who was watching a winter storm from his cozy home. (He lived a long way from Singapore!) As Christmas drew closer, he wondered, “What’s the big deal about Christmas? I mean what’s so special about the birth of this baby they call Jesus?” As he reflected, he went to the window to see the flurries getting heavier and heavier. Then he went back to his chair by the fireside. A moment later, he was startled by a thudding sound, then another, and then another. At first he thought someone must be throwing snowballs against the window, but when he went to the front door, he found a flock of birds huddled miserably in the snow. They had been caught in the storm. Trying to get back to safety, they tried to fly through his large landscaped window.

He could not let the poor creatures freeze! He immediately thought of the barn where they kept the farm animals. That would provide a warm shelter, if he could direct the birds to it. Quickly he put on his coat and boots and tramped through the deepening snow to the barn, opening the doors wide and turning on the lights. But the birds did not come in.

He figured that food would entice them in. So he hurried back to the house and fetched bread crumbs. He spread them on the snow, making a trail to the wide open doorway of the stable. But to his dismay, the birds ignored the crumbs and continued to flop around helplessly in the snow. He tried to catch them and shoo them into the barn, running and waving his arms, but this too failed. They just scattered in every direction except to the warm barn. Then he realized they were afraid of him.

He realized that to these tiny birds, he was a strange and terrifying creature. Anything he did made them frightened and confused. They would not follow.

“If only I could think of some way to let them know that they can trust me… To let them know that I’m not trying to hurt them but help them… But how?”

“If only I could be a bird, and mingle with them… speak their language and tell them not to be afraid… and show them the way to the safe warm barn…But if I were to do that, I would have to be one of them, so they could see, and hear and understand…”

At that moment, the man’s heart was gripped. Not for the birds, but for the true meaning of Christmas. His mind began to spin as thoughts flooded his head. He realized that what he wanted to do for the birds, the message of Christmas claims that God has done this for mankind in Jesus. Could this be true?

He finally understood why the birth of the baby Jesus celebrated on Christmas was so significant—if it was true. He had heard the story—that Jesus was God’s son, and that He became a man—this tiny baby born on Christmas morning. A baby who cries like one of us. A child who plays like one of us. A man who knows what it is like to be one of us. What tremendously loving God would stoop as low as a helpless baby to make Himself known to us?

And yet, He knew there was more to the story. That tiny baby of Christmas morning grew up! He’d heard stories about Jesus healing the blind and the lame. He heard that Jesus believed He died to save us from our sins and give us eternal life—and then rose from the dead! He had even heard that Jesus himself claimed to be God. Could these things be true? Maybe Jesus was crazy, he reasoned. Or maybe He was lying... but that didn’t make sense. Everyone knows Jesus was a wise, good man. But he himself said he was God. Could it be true? Maybe not, but if it was—what a gracious, loving and beautiful God!

He picked up a booklet he’d found years before and read it through.

1. God created us for His glory, to know Him, live for Him, tell of His greatness.

"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God" (1 Corinthians 10:31).

2. Every man has failed to glorify God as He is owed (called sin), and deserves God’s justice.

"All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" (Romans 3:23).

"The wages of sin is death..." (Romans 6:23).

3. Yet, in God’s mercy, He sent His own Son, Jesus, to pay the penalty for our sin and restore us to God.

"For Christ died for sins once for all, the righteous for the unrighteous, to bring us to God" (1 Peter 3:18).

4. Forgiveness, eternal life and unending joy with God are promised to those who repent of their sin and put their trust in Jesus.

"Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out" (Acts 3:19).

“The wages of sin is death…but the free gift of God is eternal life in Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 6:23)

"Believe in the Lord Jesus and you will be saved" (Acts 16:31).

Was THIS the meaning of Christmas? No wonder this baby was so special! If these things were true, then the man knew that He couldn’t just put his Christmas decorations away and forget about this baby. He knew that if it was true, then he must respond to this message and it would change his life. Part of him wanted to forget about the whole thing. After all, in just a week, the lights and colors of Christmas would be past.

But what if it was true?

You can read the words of Jesus for yourself in the Bible, the gospel of Luke.

You can also find in the Bible the references listed in red.

Christmas tree before the destruction, (see below).

It seems it will be a quiet Christmas around Kentish Green. Some of our close neighbors will be traveling. It adds to this feeling I've been having about the holidays. Here it is-- "I'm responsible to make it just right for our family and create all these Wallace family traditions of our own that our girls will remember when they start their own families, and I don't even know how to make a turkey!! AH!"

Last year since we had just arrived in Singapore, it just seemed not-quite-right because we didn't know anyone. Now it seems not-quite-right because...why?

Is it the 90 degree weather while "Let It Snow" is playing on the CD player?
Is it wondering where in the world we will be living by NEXT Christmas?
Is it longing for a store like MJ Designs or Hobby Lobby where I could find some decorations for, say, under $50??

OK, it's not that bad.

We had our tree up-- actually on Thanksgiving day. Since daddy could only take Thurs. off and we wanted to do it together, this was our only choice. (Since I've promised Kathryn for months we would most certainly do it the day after thanksgivng, even waiting till Saturday was far too late!) She was so delighted to put up the tree. Now instead of waking me up first thing in the morning, she turns on the lights and sits on the bean bag in front of the tree. Many of the ornaments, however, are dying painful deaths. Slow, agonizing, multiple-injury deaths by toddler. The survivors have slowly migrated to the top half of the tree so now the bottom half is barren.

And we started our first advent wreath this year. It's actually not a wreath. It's 4 candles circled around a bigger candle. It's drama and some singing as we make a dash to rescue curious fingers from the flame. So yes, we have begun a stab towards our own family traditions.

So what's missing? I think it's that I can't make it the same as my childhood. I suppose it's me letting go of expectations, letting go of the feeling that I must provide for our girls something like Christmas as I remember it. Letting go of the responsibility to do it "right" and just learning to do it together.

Maybe there's freedom in that. And maybe Jesus can come and be our guest here, at our little family Christmas celebration here in Singapore, even if I don't know how to make a turkey.

China was a treat. Was it China, or was it the 60-70 degree temps, coupled with great fellowship of our friends who still live there? And there's just something homey about being there. The girls and I stayed for 10 days with our friends while the daddies attended some meetings.

Moments worth noting:

--After the dads came back from their meetings, my dear friend Amy and I took a getaway to Hangzhou. Early that morning at the bus station, I had awoken with a sore throat and went off to look for a cup of hot water. (This should be easy in China as everyone drinks hot water with their breakfast.) I approached the service counter and asked for hot water. She replied:
"You beizi ma?" (Do you have a cup?)
"Mei you." (No.)
"Mei ban fa" (It's impossible, i.e., there's no hope for you to get hot water.)
And then she said she'd sell me one for "yi mao", (less than a penny). I suppose she meant, "If you want to get this water for FREE, then it's compeltely hopeless. But if you're willing to fork over a fraction of a cent, then we can talk." I'm not making an economic comment here-- truly, a beggar would be offended if you gave them this coin. Baffling.

--As we took the bus from one city to another, I noticed a big change since we lived here 6 years ago. Formerly as you travelled through the countrysides, all you would observe would be farmer's communities of concrete slab housing. Field after field after field of rice paddies. But six years later I noticed that these "between cities" communities were much more developed. Attractive housing, businesses, roads built into the hills, thriving little cities.

...That's all that comes to me now. And some new pictures are in order. I love these cultural ones, caputured by amateur photographer and dear friend Shelly Au!

Anybody want a rose?

Bamboo scaffolding is still the favorite building method. Watch out below!

These bikes are still a main mode of transporting goods...